If you’re an ESL tutor, you’ve probably had one of those lessons—the kind where your student barely says a word, and you end up talking to yourself for most of the session. It’s awkward. It’s quiet. And sometimes, it makes you question if you’re doing something wrong.

As someone who’s been teaching one-on-one English classes online for over a year now, I’ve had my fair share of silent sessions. And I mean the kind where I ask, “How are you today?” and get a long… pause… followed by a polite smile or a soft “fine.” That’s it. Cue the virtual crickets.

But here’s what I’ve learned: when a student doesn’t talk, it doesn’t always mean they’re bored or disinterested. Sometimes, they’re nervous. Or overwhelmed. Or just unsure of what to say—or how to say it.

And honestly? That’s fair. Learning a new language is like being dropped into a pool when you don’t quite know how to swim. Some students dive right in, others need floaties, and a few stand on the edge just staring at the water.

In this post, I’ll walk you through some tried-and-tested ways to get those quiet students talking—without making it awkward or pushy. Whether you’re new to ESL tutoring or just feeling stuck with a particular student, I hope you’ll find something helpful (and maybe even a little reassuring).

Let’s talk about it.

1. Understand the Root Causes

Before jumping into activities or changing your teaching style, it helps to pause and figure out why your student isn’t speaking in the first place. There’s usually a reason behind the silence—and it’s not always obvious. In one-on-one online classes, the pressure can feel even more intense because there’s no one else to shift the spotlight to. It’s just you and them, face to face on a screen.

Here are some common reasons students go quiet:

✏️ They’re scared of making mistakes.

Many students don’t want to say anything unless it’s “perfect,” especially if they’ve been corrected too often in the past. I once had a junior high student who would only give one-word answers. Turned out, his teacher at school often called him out in front of classmates when he got answers wrong. So now, even in a safe space, he was too afraid to try.

👉 What helps: Let them know it’s okay to make mistakes. You can even make light of your own slip-ups. I sometimes say, “My Tagalog isn’t perfect either—let’s help each other!” It makes things feel less formal and more like teamwork.

✏️They don’t know what to say.

Sometimes, it’s not fear—it’s vocabulary. Maybe they want to answer but don’t know how. For example, you might ask, “What did you do last weekend?” and get a blank stare. They might be trying to say “I just stayed home and watched YouTube,” but can’t find the words.

👉 What helps: Break it down. Offer choices. “Did you go outside? Stay at home? Watch something?” Give them words to work with, especially if they’re beginners.

✏️ They’re shy or introverted.

Not every quiet student is struggling with English. Some are just naturally reserved, especially when speaking to someone new or unfamiliar. It’s nothing personal.

👉 What helps: Go slow. Ask about things they do enjoy. One of my shyest students opened up after I asked about her favorite anime character. From then on, we had a 10-minute warm-up chat before every lesson.

✏️They’re not used to one-on-one settings.

In some cultures, students aren’t encouraged to speak freely with their teacher, and they might be unsure if it’s even okay to talk a lot in class.

👉 What helps: Reassure them that this space is for them. You can say things like, “This class is your time to practice speaking freely—it’s not like school.” The more they feel it’s their space, the more comfortable they’ll get.

✏️ Something’s bothering them.

Maybe they’re tired, sick, or just had a bad day. One of my students once said just three words in 25 minutes. I later found out he had just returned from cram school and barely had time to eat dinner.

👉 What helps: If you sense something’s off, keep the lesson light. Use simpler activities, crack a small joke, or ask them how they’re feeling. A little empathy goes a long way.

Once you understand what might be holding them back, it’s easier to choose the right strategy to help them open up.

2. Create a Safe and Supportive Learning Environment

When a student doesn’t feel safe, they won’t speak—no matter how simple the question is. And in a one-on-one online class, that feeling of being under a microscope can make them shut down even more. That’s why it’s so essential to build a space that feels warm, encouraging, and low-pressure from the very first lesson.

✏️Start with a friendly tone.

Think about how you’d talk to someone new at a party—polite, relaxed, and open. Same thing here. Smile. Use their name. Keep your voice calm and warm. It sounds basic, but it matters. A cheerful “Hi! How was your day?” sets a completely different tone than jumping straight into the lesson.

✏️Don’t jump into corrections right away.

Imagine saying something in another language, only to be corrected mid-sentence. That’s enough to make anyone go quiet. Instead of pointing out every grammar slip, try repeating what they said using the correct form:

Student: “He go to school yesterday.”
You: “Oh, he went to school yesterday? Nice! What did he do there?”

You’re helping them without calling it a mistake—and that feels much safer.

✏️Keep your facial expressions and gestures soft and encouraging.

You don’t need to be overly animated, but a nod, a smile, or even a thumbs-up can do wonders. When students feel seen and supported, they’re more likely to take a risk and speak up—even if they’re unsure.

✏️Make your classroom a judgment-free zone.

Tell your student it’s totally okay to pause, say “I don’t know,” or even use their native language if they get stuck. One of my students sometimes types the Japanese word in chat and asks, “What’s this in English?” And I love that. It shows they’re trying. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s progress.

✏️Let them know they’re in control, too.

Students feel more at ease when they know what to expect. Start your class by saying something like, “Let’s just practice speaking today—no pressure, okay?” Or ask, “Would you rather do a short conversation or just listen and repeat today?” Giving them options makes them feel respected, not pressured.

✏️Celebrate the little wins.

Saying even one full sentence is a big deal for some students. Treat it like it matters—because it does. I once had a super quiet middle schooler who finally said, “I like basketball” without me prompting him. I smiled and said, “Awesome! That’s a great sentence. Let’s talk more about it!” You could see him sit a little taller after that.

In short, the more your student feels relaxed and supported, the more likely they will take the leap and speak—even if they start slow.

3. Use Interactive Strategies to Encourage Speaking

Once your student feels a bit more at ease, the next step is to gently get them talking. You don’t need fancy tools or over-the-top activities. The goal here is to make speaking feel less like a test and more like a conversation. Fun, low-pressure, and easy to join in.

Here are some strategies that work well in one-on-one online classes:

✏️Start with simple choices.

If your student goes quiet when you ask open-ended questions like, “What did you do today?”—try offering two options instead. For example:

“Did you play games or watch TV today?”
It’s way easier for a shy or unsure student to pick from options than to think of a full answer on their own.

✏️Use images or props.

Screen share a picture or show one on your phone and ask, “What do you see?” or “What’s happening here?” You can even pull up food photos, cute animals, or famous places—whatever fits their interests. One of my teen students opened up after I shared a picture of a messy bedroom and asked, “Is this your room?” He laughed and said, “No! My sister’s!” We ended up having a great little back-and-forth from that.

✏️Incorporate their hobbies.

If you know your student loves anime, K-pop, Minecraft, or basketball—use that. Ask them about their favorite characters, teams, or songs. Even a “Who’s better: BTS or Seventeen?” can open up a whole conversation if that’s their thing.

✏️Play quick, low-pressure games.

Simple games like Would You Rather, 5-Second Rule, or This or That work great. You don’t even need slides. Just say:

“Would you rather eat pizza forever or never eat sweets again?”
It’s silly, fun, and opens up chances for follow-up questions. Plus, it makes the class feel more like chatting with a friend.

✏️Use role-play—but keep it casual.

Don’t go full drama club here. Keep it light and real-life. Pretend to order from a café menu, buy something online, or plan a weekend trip. Give them a script at first if needed, then slowly let them improvise.

✏️Type + Speak Combo.

If they’re still hesitant, ask them to type their answer in the chat first, then try reading it aloud. It removes the fear of thinking and speaking at the same time. Once they realize they can say it, they often keep going.

✏️Praise effort, not just accuracy.

If a student gives a short, awkward answer, don’t rush to correct. Instead, say something like, “That’s a good start!” or “Nice! Let’s build on that.” Make the focus about trying, not getting it 100% correct.

The more fun and relaxed speaking becomes, the less scary it feels. Even the quietest students will usually warm up when they realize the lesson isn’t about being perfect—it’s about expressing themselves, one small step at a time.

4. Gradually Increase the Speaking Demands

Once your student starts talking—even just a little—it’s tempting to dive right into full conversations. But going from one-word answers to open dialogue takes time. It’s like leveling up in a game—you don’t start at expert mode.

✏️Begin with repeat-after-me.

For beginners or nervous students, start with short, repeatable phrases. Once they’re comfortable echoing you, move to sentence-building.

✏️ Use sentence starters.

Instead of asking, “What do you think?” try giving a head start:

“I think…”, “In my opinion…”, or “My favorite is…”
This gives them structure so they don’t feel lost.

✏️Layer questions.

Ask one simple question, then build on it:

“Do you like music?” (yes)
“What kind of music?” (pop)
“Which singer?” (Taylor Swift)
“Why do you like her?” (because the songs are emotional)
Before they know it, they’ve spoken four sentences.

✏️Ask for opinions and reasons.

Instead of yes/no, try:

“Which do you prefer, cats or dogs? Why?”
The “why” gently encourages longer answers without pressure.

✏️Use previous answers as a launchpad.

If your student says, “I like pizza,” respond with:

“Nice! Do you cook it at home or order delivery?”
It feels natural, like a real conversation—not an exam.

Your students’ responses will grow bit by bit. Keep the pressure low, build slowly, and watch their confidence catch up with their skills.

5. Build Confidence with Positive Reinforcement

Confidence grows from being safe enough to try. For many ESL students, especially the quiet ones, hearing “That’s correct!” isn’t as powerful as hearing, “Great try!” or “Nice effort!”

✏️Celebrate small wins.

Did they answer in a full sentence for the first time? Smile. Nod. Say, “That was really good!” Even a simple “Good job!” after a one-word response can make them feel seen and encouraged.

✏️Be specific with praise.

Instead of just “Well done,” try:

“You used the past tense correctly—awesome!”
“Great pronunciation of that difficult word!”
It shows them what they did well, so they know it wasn’t just luck.

✏️Acknowledge effort over accuracy.

If they make a mistake, focus on the fact that they tried. You might say,

“I love that you answered quickly—don’t worry about the grammar, we’ll fix that together.”
It removes fear from the process and replaces it with trust.

✏️Repeat their good responses.

When they say something clearly, repeat it back with a smile:

“You said, ‘I went to the park yesterday’—perfect!”
Hearing it echoed reinforces that they did well.

Confidence builds in layers, not leaps. Your encouragement could be the reason your student finally speaks a little more in the next class.

6. Recognize and Address External Factors

Sometimes, a student’s silence has nothing to do with your lesson. Maybe they had a long day at school, skipped dinner, or just felt off. In online one-on-one classes, it’s easier to notice when something’s not right—because all your attention is on them.

✏️Look for signs.

If your usually chatty student is suddenly quiet or seems distracted, don’t assume they’re bored. They might just be tired or dealing with something personal. A quick check-in like,

“Rough day today?”
can open the door for them to share—or at least feel that you care.

✏️Adjust your pace.

If they’re clearly not in the mood for heavy speaking practice, switch to a lighter activity. Maybe do a fun quiz, play a word game, or just have a casual chat about their favorite snack.

✏️Consider their schedule.

Some students take classes late at night or after school hours and cram lessons. That kind of exhaustion manifests as silence, not defiance.

Being flexible and reading the room (or in this case, the screen) can make all the difference. A little empathy goes a long way in helping your student feel understood—and more willing to speak next time.

7. Be Empathetic and Understanding

Teaching isn’t just about grammar points and speaking drills—it’s also about being kind. Sometimes, your student doesn’t need correction right away. They just need to feel like you’re on their side.

I remember one student who quietly said during class, “My other tutor scolded me when I said it wrong twice.” That stuck with me. And honestly? It made me feel awful. Why would anyone make a student feel worse for trying? English isn’t their first language—it’s why they’re here. If you’re not up for that challenge, maybe this job isn’t for you.

Empathy means remembering how hard it is to learn something new. It’s choosing to encourage instead of criticize. It’s saying, “That’s okay, let’s try again,” with a smile—even when they mess up for the third or fourth time.

At the end of the day, your kindness might be the very thing that helps your student keep showing up.

Final Thoughts

Every quiet student has a voice—they just need the right space, time, and support to use it. As tutors, we’re not just teaching a language. We’re helping someone find the courage to speak up, even when it feels uncomfortable.

So the next time your student goes silent, pause. Observe. Adjust. And lead with patience.

What’s one small shift you can make in your next class to help your student feel more heard?